Big impediment to growth - EGO

Few days back I got an SMS which read – Management is defined in the word itself – MANAGEMENT - If you remove T it becomes ‘MANAGE’ ‘MEN’ & if you remove N it becomes ‘MANAGE’ ‘ME’ (ego)..EGO – The word itself sounds so negative..You get those negative vibes when you see or hear about it..( I am sure people who actual display also would be in a very uncomfortable state deep down somewhere) It is nothing less than a crime to possess and display ego & is a deterrent to growth of an individual, his team (or family) & the organization..I’ve been working since last 7.5 years (decent time to come across different kinds of people) in the corporate world and have come across some of the most ego centric people..Their typical characteristics are:-

1) They think they are the best & know everything
2) They find it derogatory to speak to their juniors (don’t even bother to say Hi or Good Morning...)
3) They would like to be distinguished and would always want special treatment ( very commonly seen in the corporate world)
4) The ego clashes of two or more senior individuals can lead to a catastrophic effect on the group. Leads to unnecessary clashes and the targets are not met & objectives not solved...( which is just not felt by these people)

Some classic scenarios & examples:

1) ‘I would like to be called Sir and have an objection if people call me by name’ –> Let us tell these people that we know it is in our culture to respect our seniors but it doesn’t come by calling Sir (It won’t solve the purpose if one calls Sir and deep down his heart hates him/her) & how can an individual have an objection in being called by his own name..(I must say that it doesn’t mean that you should not say sir to anybody..Rather I would say that it should be left to the individual how he wants to call his senior..I myself call some individuals by Sir because I genuinely feel that they are Sirs for me.)

2) I have X years of experience and know much better –> Well this is preposterous in today’s context..The new generation is far more exposed so they have a quite a few things to offer new on the table..Let us be open to learn and from anybody for that matter..A seven year old kid can teach us many things today..

3) Why should I contact him/her? I am the senior..Let him approach me.. –> Umpteen examples seen daily on this approach displaying oodles of attitude..Only kills time & may be becomes a costly approach..Can be used as a cost saving tool if we shed our egos here

4) In an individual’s personal life –> There are lot of problems just coz of ego -Husband Wife relation, Father son relation & the combination can be between anybody with anybody..& the reasons can be many & very trivial but we land up in uncompromising state and are ready to lose the relation but not our ego..How foolish can we get?

The list can go on & on..The moot point is that how many of us are now doing this without realizing? It has reached our subconscious mind and the ego layer is so strong that it just does not go easily.

One also doesn’t realize that when he/ she displays such attitude it percolates down to his younger ones in the family, his team members in the office/ group and in his social network also ..You will see lot of cases where an ego centric individual will have people working under him who develop such attitude..Mind you this also happens more out of frustration..

You can’t expect people to love you & like you if you are nothing but a bundle of ego..These are nightmarish experiences which one doesn’t want to get into..All I request from my readers is that let us be gentle , open, soft & approachable..If we are then there will be a different world for us..Let us bring this change..It is the need of the hour.
I learnt a very good lesson from my friend Ravindra Jaiswal few days back & it is :-

There are four kinds of people in this world:-
1) Momentum Maker – Who initiates a positive approach for a set target
2) Momentum Taker – Who accepts the approach & are glad to work on it
3) Momentum Faker – Who on the face say yes but actually don’t do anything

4) Momentum Breaker - Who on the face of it disagree and are not interested in the approach.

Let us ensure that we fall in the first two categories for all positive & fruitful approaches & should never land in to the momentum faker category..

Would urge all of you to think on this area and may be discuss the same with your colleagues, family members, friends etc.. ( It isn’t that we are always correct – I myself have displayed ego but the fact is whether do we realize & correct ourselves or not..Thanks to all those who guided me when required to make the change)